What makes me feel good, I think. What makes me feel excited, too. Chocolates, romantic scenes, seeing my friends - though it's questionable - and seeing my face and noting that I do not look haggard as I really am.
What makes my heart flutter is the thought that I'm going to graduate on time and finish this theatre production in success. What makes my heart flutter is seeing my crush or any important people. I am like a rose floating on a lily pad. Though I'm not exactly sure how come that's possible unless a frog would actually go and put a rose there. But even that seems impossible and very - uhm- how do we say it? Just absurd.
So randomly, I don't know. What makes me flutter is when I took a liking on an idea and I can't sleep until I write it off. What makes my heart flutter is every blink, every glance, every stolen moments where I can view your whole profile in my head.
But you are faceless and I don't you and I hope that you remain inside me. I don't want you real. Because I don't want you manipulating and destroying everything I created for myself. I don't want you meddling and ruining what I've planned for myself.
But your absence is making me re-think all the possibilities that fairy tale has promised me. I long to have a happy ending too - but at the same despise the very idea of it. You are a fragment of what is utopic to me. I therefore don't want you personifying the very idea of my ideal. You should vanish and let my mind extinguish you.
The mere thought of it makes my heart flutter too, among the other random things I've thought awhile ago.
You are not a person but an idea that I'm trying to get rid of. I want you gone. I want you away. It will make my heart flutter so fast, so wild and I will drown myself in the very idea of your non-existence and I feel exactly okay - not good or better but okay.
Do you understand what I'm saying anymore? Or my randomness in this prompt has gotten the better of you? Yeah, it's random. After all, it's just a writing prompt. I write with no specific subject or object in mind. I write on the concept. Defying what exactly people has built in our minds as a conventional process.
My mind is twisted no? But it makes my heart flutter too. Knowing things that I - like I want them.
I'm a stubborn kid. I know.
Minutes: 10 mins.
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